It’s something a lot of people suffer with, but most don’t want to talk about – hearing loss and its effect on personal relationships. Hearing loss can cause communication barriers that result in misunderstandings and frustration for both partners.
With Valentine’s Day right around the corner isn’t it a great time to express your love and appreciation for your loved one? A great way to do this is to talk to your loved one about your hearing loss.
Having “the talk”
Studies have found that an individual with neglected hearing loss is 2.4 times more likely to experience dementia, and that includes Alzheimer’s disease. A cascade effect that will inevitably affect the entire brain will be caused when the region of your brain responsible for hearing becomes less engaged. Doctors refer to this as brain atrophy. It’s the “use it or lose it” principle in action.
Depression numbers among those who have hearing loss are nearly double that of an individual with healthy hearing. People often become anxious and agitated as their hearing loss progresses according to research. This can lead to the person being self secluded from friends and family. They are also likely to stop involving themselves in the activities they used to enjoy as they fall deeper into a state of sadness.
Relationships between family, friends, and others then become strained. Communication issues need to be managed with patients and compassion.
Mystery solved
Someone who is experiencing hearing loss might not be ready to discuss it. They might feel shame and fear. Denial might have set in. You might need to do a bit of detective work to figure out when it’s time to have the conversation.
Here are some outward clues you will have to depend on because you can’t hear what other people are hearing:
- Avoiding busy places
- Cranking the volume way up on your TV
- School, work, and hobbies are starting to become difficult
- Avoiding conversations
- Frequent misunderstandings
- Complaining about buzzing, humming, static, or other noises that you can’t hear
- Starting to notice anxiety and agitation in social situations
- Failing to hear alerts, doorbells, and other important sounds
Look for these common symptoms and plan to have a heart-to-heart conversation with your loved one.
How to discuss hearing loss
This discussion may not be an easy one to have. A loved one might become defensive and brush it off if they’re in denial. That’s why it’s important to discuss hearing loss in a sensitive and appropriate way. You might need to alter your language based on your unique relationship, but the strategies will be more or less the same.
- Step 1: Tell them how much you love them unconditionally and how much you value your relationship.
- Step 2: You’re concerned about their health. You’ve read through the research. You’re aware that neglected hearing loss can lead to a higher chance of depression and dementia. You don’t want your loved one to go through that.
- Step 3: Your own safety and health are also a worry. An excessively loud TV could damage your hearing. Also, your relationship can be impacted, as studies have revealed that excessively loud noise can cause anxiety. Your loved one may not hear you calling for help if you’ve fallen or someone’s broken into the house. People connect with others through emotion. Simply listing facts won’t have as much impact as painting an emotional picture.
- Step 4: Schedule an appointment to have your hearing tested together. After you make the decision schedule an appointment as soon as possible. Don’t wait.
- Step 5: There may be some objections so be prepared. These could occur at any time in the process. You know this person. What sort of objections will they have? Money? Time? Doesn’t see an issue? Do they think they can use homemade remedies? (You recognize “natural hearing loss cures” don’t really work and could do more harm than good.)
Have your responses prepared beforehand. You may even rehearse them in the mirror. They don’t have to match those listed above word-for-word, but they should concentrate on your loved one’s concerns.
Relationship growth
If your partner is unwilling to talk about their hearing loss, it can be difficult. Openly discussing the impact of hearing loss on your relationship can help to establish a plan to deal with any communication challenges and ensure that both partners are heard and understood. By having this talk, you’ll grow closer and get your partner the help they need to live a longer, healthier, more fulfilling life. And relationships are, after all, about growing together.
References
https://www.nidcd.nih.gov/health/statistics/quick-statistics-hearing#
https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/hearing-loss-common-problem-older-adults
